If someone had told me that my trip to Waikoloa Beach Hawaii would change my life forever, I would probably think that an odd thing to say. After all, how can an island in the middle of the Pacific Ocean alter someone’s entire being?

Well, I experienced it, and I'm here to tell you that traveling to Hawaii was the most eye-opening experience for me. I went to that island expecting to have the vacation of my lifetime, but walked away with the deepest love for nature, my family, and humanity as a whole. The life lessons that I learned in Hawaii will be forever etched into the deepest parts of my heart, and this experience truly changed my perspective about life.

Before landing in Kona on the “Big Island,” I knew very little about Hawaii. And I am not exaggerating. I knew about the tourism, the incredible excursions (the ones I researched), the breathtaking turquoise beaches, the volcanic activities, and of course, the brief history that they taught us in school. You know - the superficial "stuff" that you can learn from the most basic internet search. My goal in Hawaii was to celebrate my milestone birthday (cough, cough, 35+) in a big way so I could brag about my ultimate vacation getaway when I returned to the mainland. 

But the island gave me something else – another story to tell. And unless you’ve visited Hawaii, you would probably never realize that it’s not just a gorgeous oasis in the sun that attracts millions of visitors every year. It’s a sacred place with a deep spiritual meaning, full of people who respect the land and each other. And that brings me to the first life lesson I learned in Hawaii: respect. 

1. Respect for Family, Culture, and Humanity

There are two Hawaiis - one for the native Hawaiians and the other for the tourists visiting the island. And if you’re firmly in the second camp -- a tourist on a mission wanting to see all the touristy sights -- then you would probably never experience the true essence of the Big Island. It's called the Big Island because of the vast size of it. It’s the largest island in the chain, but surprisingly, it’s the youngest. The rugged landscape is a reflection of the volcanic activity that formed the island. As you drive, you’ll see the hardened black lava that has since been frozen in time. At first, it was quite shocking, but then I came to understand how nature plays an intricate role here, which I will discuss later, but I digress.

This lesson of respect came at the oddest time during my trip. Believe it or not, on day 5 in Hawaii, I ate shrimp from a local restaurant, and I ended up getting sick. Who wants to be sick on vacation? However, this was a blessing in disguise. 

I didn’t mention it before, but my mom accompanied me on this trip, and I am glad she did. I was so sick that we couldn’t venture off the resort, so we ended up spending the day on the grounds of the Waikoloa Beach hotel. It was there that I met two young men who were preparing the kalua pig for the Hawaiian luau later that evening. At first, they were hesitant to engage with me because to them, I was probably nothing but a mere tourist who was there to enjoy the island and leave. And frankly, they weren’t wrong about that.

After we began our conversation, they explained that some Hawaii residents found tourists to be entitled. Again, they weren't wrong about that. Some of us mainlanders, without realizing it, can appear to be disrespectful, especially if we don’t take the time to learn from the people that we encounter. It made me realize that I, too, didn’t take the time to learn about the Hawaiian culture before I visited the island – something I now regret. As mentioned, my only concern was to have the best vacation of my life and then return home.

After chatting with the young men, I discovered that the Hawaiians are kindhearted people with a tremendous respect for their culture and traditions, which is so profound that it is part of their everyday being. I believe the people on the Big Island were created with big hearts - the spirit of Aloha is quite evident here. Everything from their families to the tourists that they meet to the Hawaiian Luau performances, the preparation of the Imu oven for the kalua pig, and the land beneath their feet to the nature around them -- they have a deep and profound love and respect for it all. This brings me to my next life lesson: loving and appreciating nature.

2. Love for Nature

Before I went to Hawaii, I was not an outdoorsy person. In fact, my idea of fun was happy hour with my friends and coworkers, eating delicious food, or going shopping at a mall. Just writing that made me pass judgment on myself. Either way, as mentioned on day 5 in Hawaii, I got really sick, but that didn’t compare to the threat of a hurricane passing over the Big Island on day 2. So, I had a week on the island, but two of those days were impacted by something out of my control. Obviously, Hawaii was trying to teach me another lesson -- and I listened. 

Thankfully, the hurricane missed us, but I gained so much from that day. For the first time in a long while, I sat under a tree and was completely at peace. Being outside feeling a warm breeze against my skin, staring at a gorgeous amber sunset, while doing absolutely nothing, can cure even the most heartbroken soul. That day, nature threatened the island, but it also showed me how extremely beautiful it can be. Ever since then, if I see a sunset, I will always pause to marvel at it. Thanks to Hawaii, I learned what it meant to truly live in the moment: my next life lesson. 

3. Living in the Moment

Prior to my trip to Hawaii, if someone told me to live in the moment, I probably would have rolled my eyes and not given it a second thought. But today, living in the moment is what drives my very being. It’s so profound that my mantra is: to always find the best part of every day and bask in it. I understand that every day won't be perfect, but there are moments in every day that make that day worth living. Being with my mom in Hawaii, even with a nasty stomach bug, was one of the best times in my life. 

We didn’t get to see all the beaches that I had on my list, nor did we make it to the summit of Mauna Kea, nor did we get to see the volcanoes. Typically, I would have thought that my vacation was ruined, but my soul was so fulfilled that I didn’t feel like I missed out on anything. 

Hawaii is a spiritual place, and even if you don’t get to see all the sights and sounds, there is so much beauty around you that you can find something beautiful in your day and just fall in love with life. Slowing down and living in the moment is something we all need to practice more of. Plus, we live in a world where we want to capture everything in real time by pulling out our phones. Don’t get me started on how much time I’ve spent on my phone while on vacation - that’s a story for another day. We find ourselves experiencing FOMO - fear of missing out - so we attempt to capture and document each and every moment because we are so afraid we'll miss something along the way. This brings me to my next life lesson from Hawaii: overcoming fear.

4. Don’t Let Fear Ruin Joy

One thing to know is that fear can cripple our very being. In my own life, I have skipped a lot of opportunities because I was too afraid to take the leap. In Hawaii, I learned how to overcome fear from my mother. Typically, my mom is a timid person. She doesn’t like heights, she doesn’t like rollercoasters, she doesn’t like the outdoors… you get the point. Anything that threatens her comfort zone, and she's out. I am kind of the same way, but a little bit more adventurous. Since my illness meant we weren’t able to do many of the excursions I'd planned, I selected an activity that I believe was safe enough that wouldn’t cause too much anxiety - the Atlantis Submarine Dive in Kona. 

When my mom discovered I booked this excursion she was adamant she had no interest in getting in any submarine to go to the bottom of the ocean floor. The day leading to the trip she kept telling me that she wasn’t doing it. Of course, the trip was already paid for, which is something she understood, but I don’t think that mattered to her - she DID NOT want to do it. 

On the day of the excursion, we headed to Kona and she was eerily calm. She barely said a word while we sat in the taxi even when I was trying to include her in the conversation I was having with the driver. It’s so weird, in Hawaii, I wanted to talk to everyone that I came in contact with… something I would never do back home. I just realized that at this moment. But I digress. 

Seeing my mom so calm, I was honestly scared that she was going to have a panic attack, and I was ready to accept that this day was not going to go as planned. However, something else happened. When I asked my mom if she was okay, she said she was. And when I asked her if she was ready for the ride to the bottom of the ocean, surprisingly she said yes. Wait… what? How was she this relaxed?

The ironic part about that situation is, as we got closer to Kona, my own fear set in. I was terrified to know that I was going to the bottom of the ocean, and anything could happen, and it was out of my control. Seriously, the way this Hawaii trip was going so far, luck was not on my side. But seeing my mom being so calm helped me to overcome my fear. She was extremely brave and showed no resistance as we cruised across the bay to meet the Atlantis.

That day, as we descended to the bottom of the ocean, I learned that fear is only a temporary state of being, and if we let it, it can seriously prevent us from experiencing a beautiful life. I had the best time drifting to the ocean floor with my mom. And it was her courage that gave me the strength to overcome my own fear.  

The Spirit of Aloha Gave My Life New Meaning

Aside from being captivated by the beauty and tranquility of the Big Island, I was deeply taken by the spirit of Aloha. Discovering a new version of myself that’s more in tune with nature as well as with others has given my life new meaning.

Hawaii didn’t go as I planned, but it played out as it was supposed to. My new goal is to one day return to the Big Island, but instead of staying in a resort, I would like to book a cottage in a local village. I would like to interact with the Hawaiian people more, visit the neighborhood markets, and sample more local cuisine. I would also like to hike the incredible trails and learn more about the land, something I wish I could’ve done during this visit. 

There is so much I would like to experience, and though I have no idea when I will make my second trip back, what I do know is that I would like to know more about the real Hawaii - the spirit of Aloha, the sacred island full of people with big hearts. I also plan on walking away with additional life lessons and perhaps change my perspective for the better again.  

Stay tuned folks, there is more to come about the island that taught me how to love nature, respect humanity, overcome fear, and how to slow down and live in the moment. The life lessons that I learned in Hawaii altered my very being, changed my perspective, and I will always love her for that.

Mahalo, Hawaii… until we meet again.